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Dating Article Archives
Online Personals Are
Cool
By Emily Nussbaum
The musty print classified was never a great way to find a
date. Most of the time, all it ever offered was a terse mumble
of data: ''SWF, 26, brown eyes and brown hair.'' The online
personal is completely different. The ''profile'' of someone
looking for romance on a site like Match.com or
Salon.com can overflow
with tantalizing information, as when a single woman named
Lovebundlenyc reveals that her favorite books include Hunter
S. Thompson's ''Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas,'' the ''Jeeves
Omnibus'' and that children's story about Ferdinand the Bull.
Some people make strange, bold proclamations: ''I'm a smooth
operator with great hands.'' Others use verbal wit to play
with the conventions of the form: ''Unscrupulous Man Seeks
Patsy,'' writes one online lonely heart.
Americans have fallen hard for the online personal. While
other Internet businesses have been sputtering, online
personals are a full-throttle success. This year, Match.com
subscriptions hit 653,000, and the online-personals industry
as a whole generated more than $53 million in the first three
months of this year. By the end of 2002, about 15 million
Americans will have visited a dating Web site.
The bigger this pool gets, the more normalized (and less
geeky) the process becomes. As with other online social
behavior, early adopters had to battle the scary hype:
Pedophiles are out there! Liars, creeps and dweebs! But when
newlyweds on the Times weddings page casually mention their
''magical'' first e-mail exchange, you know the switch has
flipped.
The popularity of online personals has tossed some interesting
behavioral mutations into the dating pool. Because potential
dates often engage in intimate e-mail before meeting, the
first date is far less blind. But the very ease and anonymity
of the initial experience -- the way you can browse at 2 a.m.,
zap a promising profile to a friend for feedback or change
your profile or photo at any time -- also encourages social
experimentation. This is a particular benefit for women, for
whom flirtation with strangers in the wee hours has always
carried greater risk. For both men and women, Internet dating
may allow singles to make contact with dates outside their
social circles. Online glances go beyond the crowded room of
one's own insular demographic.
Pundits have denounced the gamelike quality of pointing and
clicking at online profiles. And there's some truth to this:
with the
eBay ease of Internet
romance, it's simple to continually dip back in, looking for
an improved model. But then, is it really such a crime to make
dating more fun?
Source:
The New
York Times

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