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Dating Article Archives
Online Personals Are Cool
By:
Emily Nussbaum
The musty print classified was never a great
way to find a date. Most of the time, all it ever offered was
a terse mumble of data: ''SWF, 26, brown eyes and brown
hair.'' The online personal is completely different. The
''profile'' of someone looking for romance on a site like Match.com or
Salon.com can overflow
with tantalizing information, as when a single woman named
Lovebundlenyc reveals that her favorite books include Hunter
S. Thompson's ''Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas,'' the ''Jeeves
Omnibus'' and that children's story about Ferdinand the Bull.
Some people make strange, bold proclamations: ''I'm a smooth
operator with great hands.'' Others use verbal wit to play
with the conventions of the form: ''Unscrupulous Man Seeks
Patsy,'' writes one online lonely heart.
Americans have fallen hard for the online
personal. While other Internet businesses have been
sputtering, online personals are a full-throttle success. This
year, Match.com subscriptions hit 653,000, and the
online-personals industry as a whole generated more than $53
million in the first three months of this year. By the end of
2002, about 15 million Americans will have visited a dating
Web site.
The bigger this pool gets, the more normalized
(and less geeky) the process becomes. As with other online
social behavior, early adopters had to battle the scary hype:
Pedophiles are out there! Liars, creeps and dweebs! But when
newlyweds on the Times weddings page casually mention their
''magical'' first e-mail exchange, you know the switch has
flipped.
The popularity of online personals has tossed
some interesting behavioral mutations into the dating pool.
Because potential dates often engage in intimate e-mail before
meeting, the first date is far less blind. But the very ease
and anonymity of the initial experience -- the way you can
browse at 2 a.m., zap a promising profile to a friend for
feedback or change your profile or photo at any time -- also
encourages social experimentation. This is a particular
benefit for women, for whom flirtation with strangers in the
wee hours has always carried greater risk. For both men and
women, Internet dating may allow singles to make contact with
dates outside their social circles. Online glances go beyond
the crowded room of one's own insular demographic.
Pundits have denounced the gamelike quality of
pointing and clicking at online profiles. And there's some
truth to this: with the
eBay ease of Internet
romance, it's simple to continually dip back in, looking for
an improved model. But then, is it really such a crime to make
dating more fun?
Source:
The New
York Times
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